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The Personal Peace Procedure Gets Rid of Excess Baggage
As most people do, for decades I was suffering from severe old emotional and mental patterns that kept me from truly accepting myself. I was looking for a way to get rid of the energy-absorbing inside judgments and reproaches I send to myself all day long,
The moment I heard of the possibility to use the Personal Peace Procedure (PPP)to work on myself in a profound way, I immediately felt very interested. I had a few nice long summer months ahead during which I could spend enough time to get rid of a lot of remaining emotional ballast. This technique seemed to come to me as a gift from heaven to help me with this.
I started with the first step of PPP right away, making a list of (painful) incidents that happened during my youth. There seemed not to have remained many memories of my youngest childhood as I mainly remembered events that happened throughout my teenage years and the years when I was a young adult.
I felt amazed by the fact that I remembered so easily so many smaller and bigger incidents of twenty or thirty years ago. Although I already had forgotten the greater part of them (or at least that's what I thought), they still seemed to be safely hidden somewhere in my memory. Without any doubt they had really touched me in some way or another at that time.
Working on my list already seemed to be a source of new and very interesting insights. During the process of listing my old memories, I started to see a main pattern throughout all these different occurrences. Over and over again it was about the painful experience of not being accepted or approved as I was. So often I had had the feeling of being wrong, bad, bold, because I experienced things in an other way, because I looked at things differently, because I had other values and priorities. In one way or another this had always been condemned.
I felt perplexed. Suddenly everything seemed to be so clear and yet I never saw it before. And it explained so many things. The sense of inferiority I had to overcome, the wrong decisions I had made (trying to adapt myself to the expectations of others), the immensely critical attitude towards myself, the urge for perfection, the craving for affirmation.
And then I started the real work with EFT. It was a very profound experience, not only because of all the new insights that came up during the tapping of the rounds, but also because of the growing feeling of freedom while throwing overboard so much ballast. Slowly I started to release myself of the patterns of emotions, thoughts and reactions that had dominated me for decades.
Every day of the two summer months, I chose a few memories from my list and started to unload them emotionally with EFT.
Soon it became clear that the "movie-technique" worked best for me. I played the movie of the incident in my head, gave it a quotation on a scale from 0 to 10, and then started to tap rounds. I only worked on the head and body points, tapping rounds on and on until the moment I felt that the process was (almost) finished.
When I felt emotions coming up, I tapped on them until they disappeared softly. Then other emotions or very often other insights came up and I started tapping on these until they became more profound, until they evoked other new insights or emotions. I went on tapping like that, until I finally started to see the painful memory from a more relative and purifying perspective. Checking the remaining emotional intensity of the story, it mostly appeared to have gone completely, and if not, I added some more rounds.
Strangely enough, it seemed impossible to predict the intensity and the impact of the old incidents. Some seemingly profound events could just be emotionally unloaded with EFT in a surprisingly short period of time and in a rather serene way. But other occurrences, that only seemed to be a trifle, appeared to contain an intense emotional load and required a long process of tapping (sometimes it even took me about half an hour) with profound insights and intense, sometimes very unexpected, underlying emotions. Sometimes it felt violent, but always very freeing. I experienced an intense feeling of relief, every day over and again. And now? After clearing up the whole list of damaging memories, for the first time in my life I experience what it feels like just to be able to live with myself, just to accept myself the way I am. Although it still sometimes happens that I do not feel so happy with a judgment or action that I did, I can now cope with it very fast in a neutral way. I then check within myself whether I did this with the intention to hurt; if not, I know nothing wrong happened, and if I did, I immediately correct it.
That is all there is left, nothing more and nothing less.
Finally I got rid of the energy-absorbing and permanent daily process of pelting myself with criticism, reproaches, inside judgments or denigrating thoughts. It is hard to believe, but that's the way it is now. And it feels so good and so self-evident!
Now I'm no longer hijacked by all those old patterns that kept me imprisoned, my heart finally has all the space to fully experience and give love. Love for myself and for others, because by loving myself now - with all my weaknesses and strengths - I finally dare to just be myself, through which I can now approach others from freedom and love.