By Jennifer Siering, EFT practitioner
Sarah recently had a baby and even though she was feeling great about being a new mom, she was upset about how her body looked with extra skin and stretch marks, and was afraid it would stay like this for the rest of her life.
When we checked the setup statement “I hate my body,” she was at a SUD level of intensity number of 10 out of 10 and she could feel a huge knot in her diaphragm.
“Even though I hate my body right now and I’m so scared it’s going to stay like this for the rest of my life, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway.”
“Even though I’m terrified that I’m going to have this extra skin and these stretch marks for the rest of my life, they’re never going to go away, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway.”
“Even though I just hate my body so much right now! I feel so ugly with all these stretch marks and extra skin, and I’m really afraid I’m never going to get my pre-baby body back, I deeply and completely accept myself.”
We tapped several rounds on these feelings. When we tuned back in to her response to “I hate my body,” the SUD intensity was down to an 8 and the knot in her diaphragm had shifted to a rock in her stomach. Sarah was now feeling that it could be possible for her to get her old body back, but now she was just worried about how long it would take.
“Even though the doctor says I shouldn’t lose a lot of weight very quickly, in order to stay healthy for the baby, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
“Even though I’m really worried it could take forever to lose this baby weight and get my old body back, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway.”
“Even though every time I see my body, I start feeling panicked about how long it could take to lose the weight and get my body back to normal, especially since the doctor says I can’t lose the weight very quickly, I deeply and completely accept myself.”
After this round, Sarah realized she had been making lots of excuses about not exercising. She could not work out for the first 6 weeks, but the doctor had told her she could walk and she had not been walking. To figure out why she had resistance to walking, I had Sarah close her eyes and imagine she was going to go on a walk.
She visualized the process step-by-step: putting on her clothes, putting on her shoes, opening the door, going outside, and starting to walk down her street. She was completely fine during the visualization, until she stepped outside—because all she could notice was everyone judging her body and saying mean things.
“Even though all of these people are making me upset, I can tell they think I’m fat and ugly by the way they’re looking at me, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
“Even though I know people are going to judge me about how ugly and fat my body is, as soon as I go outside to walk, I deeply and completely accept myself.”
“Even though all I notice on this walk is these people looking at me and judging my body, and it’s making me feel very uncomfortable, I deeply and completely accept myself.”
After a few rounds of tapping, she was feeling better and realized if she brought her baby with her on the walk, maybe the people wouldn’t judge her as much. I asked Sarah to visualize this new setup of going on a walk with her baby. This time, she could see people were coming up to her baby to see how cute she was and weren’t even paying attention to how Sarah looked.
Sarah felt fully comfortable and wasn’t worried anymore about what people could potentially say about her.
Once we had double-checked on this, we went back to Sarah’s original problem statement of hating her body to make sure this was also fully resolved. Sarah now had no reaction when she said, “I hate my body.” Quite the opposite—she said she was at peace with her body, knowing it would change, especially now that she would be exercising.